forerunner

for us each, and for us all

---

baked into the soul of this place -
	not the soil, or the ghosts, or even the hearts,
        but the thing which may
        or may not
        be saved -
a rot
profound
tragic and ironic, in the way of the Greeks
seeping like the sludge of long-decayed vegetation
out of our pores

a gated church stands proudly down the block
from the homeless encampment;
locks, as Zhuangzi wrote, only creating thieves

.

the leader of the dead,
head of the decaying corpse of an ideal
proud men, in their time and place,
once died for,
dons now the apparatus, apparel, affect
of her victims
all to defer the funeral just one more day

how many lives for the price of coconuts?
how much can people withstand under blackmail?
how long before this soul finally wails for salvation?

Lord, Stephen cried, being stoned to death
under the not-yet-apostle’s supervision,

	do not hold this sin against them

.

sometimes, a vessel once taught me, love
can only be a refusal
and that refusal is always painful

when there is only refusal,
what is left but to pray, and wait?

be strong in the Lord, and in the power of his might

he that keeps my works to the end, i will give the morning star

.

I have placed before you an open door that no one can shut

Here I am! I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears my voice and opens the door, I will come in and eat with that person, and they with me

.

for us each, and for us all,
that Benjamin’s angel might bear witness
to redemption -
i must offer myself up to the Spirit
empty myself of images
become virgin, as the beloved one
renouce myself to announce who follows,
as the one who proclaims God’s grace
become the fertile soil in which
divine love can grow

i must prepare a place
wait lovingly, patiently, watchfully on its quickening
bear it forth upon its birth
nurture it in its infancy
nourish it in its growth
announce its coming to the world
sanctify its arrival with any blessing i bear rights to
make myself worthy to call it Friend
protect and defend it in its darkest hour
bear witness to the fullness of its being

i must, that the soul might open its gates

---